The title of this post is a phrase often used in reference to me. With this case, it happens to refer to the fact that I am posting on consecutive days. Never happened before, and it may never happen again.
Today, I would like to discuss America's Pastime. And yes, I googled it, it is actually "pastime." And no, I'm not talking about Laguna Beach. Rather, I'm talking about that most republican (namely the "grand" and the "old") of sports, baseball. For me, baseball is the classic story of undiscovered beauty that Hollywood so often exploits. A bit nerdy, rough on the edges, often looked over for more exciting things, wears glasses, trips often and drops stuff, etc. And yet, at the end of the show, baseball comes out on top. So just what is the fascination with baseball? Well, I'm not sure it's explainable in blog form, but I'm going to give it a try.
Baseball is dollar dog night and Lemon Chills. Baseball is the seventh inning stretch. It's the ballpark and the walk-off homerun. It's the organ and the constant hawking of overpriced wares. It's the hated rival and the beloved underdog. It's who is warming up in the bullpen, and the reliever coming out to face one guy before he calls it a night. It's the endless suspense of the final out. It's extra innings and rain delays. Baseball is a day game at Wrigley. It's the infinite possibilities of every pitch, swing, hit, and throw.
And for me, baseball is the Boston Red Sox. It's the Green Monster and Yawkey Way. It's Tek and Big Papi. It's hating Judas Damon, and loving Dave Roberts forever. It's THE bloody sock. It's the history. And now, it's May 23. My wife (Jesse Faris) has planned a trip to Boston on that day to see my beloved Red Sox play the hated Yankees at Fenway Park. Sorry, fellas, but she's mine. So really, I have the greatest wife ever. This is by far the greatest gift I have ever received in my entire life. It's absolutely one of the coolest things ever, and I know I'll remember it forever. I think about this trip every day and how awesome it will be and how I'll probably cry when we walk through the turnstiles and how much I hope the Sox win. It's all just perfect.
There's only one problem now. What do I get her for her birthday?
Friday, April 07, 2006
Thursday, April 06, 2006
Where is everyone?
So at thing point, I'm thinking I can type whatever I want on my blog. I'm even past the point of people commenting that they want me to post again, which is great. It basically means one of two things: 1) Jesse is tired of me enough at home to not care about what I say on my blog or 2) well, actually, maybe there's just one. I'm not even sure if more than 4 or 5 people I see on a regular basis read this. Now, if that's not an obvious cry for affirmation, then I am even more pathetic than we thought.
So, I'm married now. It'll be a month this Saturday, so I give you the obligatory "Thoughts about Being Married" post...
1. "Morning people" often clash with "night owls." At this point, I'm not entirely sure that Jesse is not some kind of mutant vampire (she can stand the sunlight, but just barely). Of course, she likes the beach, so this doesn't really work, but the point remains, my wife does not like the morning. And I, on the other hand, like to sleep at night.
2. This thought is directly related to the first. Coffee drinkers are a strange breed to me. Personaly, if you claim to be a morning person, but can't do it without your coffee, you're just faking. Either way, was is it about coffee that makes such a drastic difference on someone's mood, senses, breath, etc? Oh right, the whole addiction thing. Oh well. Besides J.J. Abrams, it's probably my second favorite addiction, so drink away America. I have a feeling this one is here to stay.
3. The Darth Vader cookie jar I got as a wedding gift from my former youth minister's kids may just be the coolest thing I own. Now, I just need to get some cookies. The "Fill Vader's Face" cookie donation station will be opening soon if you would like to make a donation.
4. That last post has little to do with being married.
5. And this one is important: ALWAYS marry an awesome person (just one at a time though). I did, and it's worked out pretty good so far.
So, I'm married now. It'll be a month this Saturday, so I give you the obligatory "Thoughts about Being Married" post...
1. "Morning people" often clash with "night owls." At this point, I'm not entirely sure that Jesse is not some kind of mutant vampire (she can stand the sunlight, but just barely). Of course, she likes the beach, so this doesn't really work, but the point remains, my wife does not like the morning. And I, on the other hand, like to sleep at night.
2. This thought is directly related to the first. Coffee drinkers are a strange breed to me. Personaly, if you claim to be a morning person, but can't do it without your coffee, you're just faking. Either way, was is it about coffee that makes such a drastic difference on someone's mood, senses, breath, etc? Oh right, the whole addiction thing. Oh well. Besides J.J. Abrams, it's probably my second favorite addiction, so drink away America. I have a feeling this one is here to stay.
3. The Darth Vader cookie jar I got as a wedding gift from my former youth minister's kids may just be the coolest thing I own. Now, I just need to get some cookies. The "Fill Vader's Face" cookie donation station will be opening soon if you would like to make a donation.
4. That last post has little to do with being married.
5. And this one is important: ALWAYS marry an awesome person (just one at a time though). I did, and it's worked out pretty good so far.
Monday, March 06, 2006
T minus 5
days and counting... and with the wedding rapidly approaching, I thought I would talk about something totally different.
Well, after trying and failing to think of anything other than the wedding for the last 30 minutes, and failed, I guess I'll talk about the wedding.
Things are going into crazy mode, like Homer with no food and no beer.
And while, I knew this would happen, I really have no idea it would be like this. I'm starting to realize that about other things, too. Like the epic fights that occur for no reason the week before the wedding. Every married person has a story about theirs, and it almost becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy:
"Well, I'm getting married this week, and I love this person and want to spend the rest of my life with them, but I'm too tired to care about that. I think I'll just selfishly act like a jerk and hope she can take it."
That's the mind of a genius right there, or it could be a sign of what the french call, "les incompetent." At least I'm not getting married to Buzz's girlfriend. Woof.
In other news, the Dallas Mavericks seemed destined to be spectators in this year's NBA chamionship, having lost to both San Antonio and Phoenix this week. Tough schedule, but a great opportunity to prove we have what it takes. That's right, "we." I am an integral part of the team, and had I watched either game, I'm certain the outcome would have been different. Being a loyal, but hopeless fan, I've decided that "we" need a curse. So, without further ado, I give you curse contestant #1, The Derek Harper Curse.
Derek Harper played 16 seasons in the NBA, 12 with the Mavs. He also had stints with the Knicks and the Magic. Derek Harper played on a team that made the playoffs 10 times, but only made it to the big dance once, losing in 7 to the Houston Rockets. Looking at the Knicks and Magic since his departure, especially this year, one can easily see the curse at work. For the Mavs, however, the curse is even more twisted, as it tempts us even more than the Knicks and Magic combined. I give you last year's playoffs series against the Suns, and the failure to foul Steve Nash play (performed to perfection by Jason Terry) which is comparable to Bill Buckner's infmaous through-the-legs ground ball error. Clearly, Derek Harper is responsible for this lapse in defensive judgment. He even LOOKS like Jason Terry. Where is Derek Harper today, you ask? He's in Dallas, doing pre-game, post-game, and play-by-play analysis for the Mavericks. Until this man is completely eradicated from the Dallas Mavericks, we will never win a championship.
This is fun. Sometime soon, I will present other theories, including the Roy Tarpley, Fat Lever, Popeye Jones, Detleft Schrempf, and the Defense-Wins-Championships Conspiracy Theories.
Did I mention that I'm getting married in five days?
Well, after trying and failing to think of anything other than the wedding for the last 30 minutes, and failed, I guess I'll talk about the wedding.
Things are going into crazy mode, like Homer with no food and no beer.
And while, I knew this would happen, I really have no idea it would be like this. I'm starting to realize that about other things, too. Like the epic fights that occur for no reason the week before the wedding. Every married person has a story about theirs, and it almost becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy:"Well, I'm getting married this week, and I love this person and want to spend the rest of my life with them, but I'm too tired to care about that. I think I'll just selfishly act like a jerk and hope she can take it."
That's the mind of a genius right there, or it could be a sign of what the french call, "les incompetent." At least I'm not getting married to Buzz's girlfriend. Woof.
In other news, the Dallas Mavericks seemed destined to be spectators in this year's NBA chamionship, having lost to both San Antonio and Phoenix this week. Tough schedule, but a great opportunity to prove we have what it takes. That's right, "we." I am an integral part of the team, and had I watched either game, I'm certain the outcome would have been different. Being a loyal, but hopeless fan, I've decided that "we" need a curse. So, without further ado, I give you curse contestant #1, The Derek Harper Curse.
Derek Harper played 16 seasons in the NBA, 12 with the Mavs. He also had stints with the Knicks and the Magic. Derek Harper played on a team that made the playoffs 10 times, but only made it to the big dance once, losing in 7 to the Houston Rockets. Looking at the Knicks and Magic since his departure, especially this year, one can easily see the curse at work. For the Mavs, however, the curse is even more twisted, as it tempts us even more than the Knicks and Magic combined. I give you last year's playoffs series against the Suns, and the failure to foul Steve Nash play (performed to perfection by Jason Terry) which is comparable to Bill Buckner's infmaous through-the-legs ground ball error. Clearly, Derek Harper is responsible for this lapse in defensive judgment. He even LOOKS like Jason Terry. Where is Derek Harper today, you ask? He's in Dallas, doing pre-game, post-game, and play-by-play analysis for the Mavericks. Until this man is completely eradicated from the Dallas Mavericks, we will never win a championship.
This is fun. Sometime soon, I will present other theories, including the Roy Tarpley, Fat Lever, Popeye Jones, Detleft Schrempf, and the Defense-Wins-Championships Conspiracy Theories.
Did I mention that I'm getting married in five days?
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
stuff
So, today is my birthday. I am now 24. AND, there are exactly 24 days until the wedding. How uncanny is that? Go me for being born on this day and for proposing on that other day!
I've been watching Mad About You with Jesse lately. It's kind of like Seinfeld with more estrogen. A lot more. And more early-90s ish. But, hey, it's classic Paul Reiser.
The Office continues to roll. Dwight Schroot bobbleheads are no doubt selling like hot cakes after last week. Similarly, Grey's Anatomy literally exploded in the last two weeks. Amazing. I recommend this show to anyone who has a face.
Oh, and the Olympics are going on right now, except on a 10 hour delay. I used to LOVE watching the Olympics as a kid. Technically, "used" should be in all caps in that last sentence. What happened to the greatness of the Olympics? Is it me, or is no one interested anymore? On SportsCenter this morning, there was a five minute segment with no clips except of Picabo Street bashing the brash Bode Miller. Totally mised in this was the fact that some guy named Ligaty won a gold medal for skiing down a mountain. NO "Ligaty-split" jokes were made. Not one. Nor did anyone comment that Ms. Street should be hooking up with that guy because who doesn't want to say "Picabo Ligaty" at least once in their lifetime?
Bob Costas is the Dick Clark of the Olympics. He doesn't age, and he'll be doing it for another 100 years. Watch, cause I won't be...
I've been watching Mad About You with Jesse lately. It's kind of like Seinfeld with more estrogen. A lot more. And more early-90s ish. But, hey, it's classic Paul Reiser.
The Office continues to roll. Dwight Schroot bobbleheads are no doubt selling like hot cakes after last week. Similarly, Grey's Anatomy literally exploded in the last two weeks. Amazing. I recommend this show to anyone who has a face.
Oh, and the Olympics are going on right now, except on a 10 hour delay. I used to LOVE watching the Olympics as a kid. Technically, "used" should be in all caps in that last sentence. What happened to the greatness of the Olympics? Is it me, or is no one interested anymore? On SportsCenter this morning, there was a five minute segment with no clips except of Picabo Street bashing the brash Bode Miller. Totally mised in this was the fact that some guy named Ligaty won a gold medal for skiing down a mountain. NO "Ligaty-split" jokes were made. Not one. Nor did anyone comment that Ms. Street should be hooking up with that guy because who doesn't want to say "Picabo Ligaty" at least once in their lifetime?
Bob Costas is the Dick Clark of the Olympics. He doesn't age, and he'll be doing it for another 100 years. Watch, cause I won't be...
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
The Home Stretch
The title of this post could be a good blog name for those eschatology freaks. No really.
Today, I was driving in the Target parking lot, and this old lady forgot to stop at the stop sign, so she had to hit the brakes when I pulled in front of her to turn, and she looked at me, and with the meanest granny face you can imagine mouthed the words, "STUPID JERK!" At first, I was mad, but then, the thought of an 80 yera old getting angry and yelling at me was pretty funny. So, naturally, I turned around, caught up, and cut in front of her again. You'll be pleased to know I got the EXACT same reaction. That was kind of mean, I know, but totally worth it. Stupid Jerk! Ha!
There aren't many months, weeks, or even days before I go to Hawaii. That's exciting. Oh, and I guess I'll be married by then, too.... Of course, I'm really more excited about getting married, I just wanted to say it cleverly. I suppose I could write more about getting married, but I don't think it would be very original. Everytime I tell any of my married friends about ANYTHING that has happened during the engagement period, they just smile and nod. It's annoying.
Don't say I never post.
Today, I was driving in the Target parking lot, and this old lady forgot to stop at the stop sign, so she had to hit the brakes when I pulled in front of her to turn, and she looked at me, and with the meanest granny face you can imagine mouthed the words, "STUPID JERK!" At first, I was mad, but then, the thought of an 80 yera old getting angry and yelling at me was pretty funny. So, naturally, I turned around, caught up, and cut in front of her again. You'll be pleased to know I got the EXACT same reaction. That was kind of mean, I know, but totally worth it. Stupid Jerk! Ha!
There aren't many months, weeks, or even days before I go to Hawaii. That's exciting. Oh, and I guess I'll be married by then, too.... Of course, I'm really more excited about getting married, I just wanted to say it cleverly. I suppose I could write more about getting married, but I don't think it would be very original. Everytime I tell any of my married friends about ANYTHING that has happened during the engagement period, they just smile and nod. It's annoying.
Don't say I never post.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)